0 comment Sunday, October 19, 2014 | admin
This is Ludo, the Leonberger which we purchased through Glenbrindy Leos as a friend and companion for our son. I used to think Samoyeds were the most docile, gentle dogs with children which ever existed, but I have been corrected.
Ludo has been fantastic, forgiving, gentle, loyal, and a delight to have in my home as part of the family.
And, sadly, she has to go.
Her care and attention has been on the back burner lately as I just don't have the energy for walks. I couldn't afford insurance anymore, and so that went as well. Then, getting her to the vet for shots proved impossible as it requires me getting a cab there and back, which brings the cost up considerably. Her training has been scatty and due to lack of socialisation and getting out and about, she's getting very excitable. I'm strong but even I am having trouble holding her back these days.
I don't have the strength or energy for poo-patrol, or walks, or even brushing sessions. My son loves her, but I have to do what is right for Ludo as well right now, and while my mobility gets worse, there's more and more chance I'll be getting out and about outside in a wheelchair - no chance I can hold her while in one of those.
And so, I contacted Glenbrindy this week about them coming and taking her for rehoming. They've been very kind about this, and understand how hard it was for me to do that, but needs must. They say finding her a home may take a while but they'll certainly help.
I feel absolutely awful - I swore to myself as a young girl I'd never own another dog again as my own mum was forced through divorce to get rid of all our dogs - and now this feels like I'm just putting my son through that particular hell of losing a pet. I know he'll blame himself somehow, and I've entertained the thought of telling her she died (horrible, I've never lied to my son before, but I've no idea what else to say which won't make him feel like it's his fault).
I guess I also feel worse in that while I will miss her terribly, I also feel relieved; no more frantically holding her back whilst a stream of social workers and care assessors come in the door; no more desperately trying to stoop to clean up after her, or trying to muster the energy to groom; no more extreme guilt when she and I both eye her walking lead and yet I know if I take her even for a 20 minute walk I won't have the energy to get through the day.
There will be a huge hole in our lives which I have no intention of filling again (no more dogs, ever. That's it.) but I am grateful to Ludo for learning "chase-game", for fetching even if it's almost unheard of for this breed to do so, for putting her head on my knee when I needed the reassurance, for giving my son a topic of conversation with people he had never met who eventually, just as I do, saw that he wasn't just this disabled "thing", but a boy with a dog.
Ludo has been fantastic, forgiving, gentle, loyal, and a delight to have in my home as part of the family.
And, sadly, she has to go.
Her care and attention has been on the back burner lately as I just don't have the energy for walks. I couldn't afford insurance anymore, and so that went as well. Then, getting her to the vet for shots proved impossible as it requires me getting a cab there and back, which brings the cost up considerably. Her training has been scatty and due to lack of socialisation and getting out and about, she's getting very excitable. I'm strong but even I am having trouble holding her back these days.
I don't have the strength or energy for poo-patrol, or walks, or even brushing sessions. My son loves her, but I have to do what is right for Ludo as well right now, and while my mobility gets worse, there's more and more chance I'll be getting out and about outside in a wheelchair - no chance I can hold her while in one of those.
And so, I contacted Glenbrindy this week about them coming and taking her for rehoming. They've been very kind about this, and understand how hard it was for me to do that, but needs must. They say finding her a home may take a while but they'll certainly help.
I feel absolutely awful - I swore to myself as a young girl I'd never own another dog again as my own mum was forced through divorce to get rid of all our dogs - and now this feels like I'm just putting my son through that particular hell of losing a pet. I know he'll blame himself somehow, and I've entertained the thought of telling her she died (horrible, I've never lied to my son before, but I've no idea what else to say which won't make him feel like it's his fault).
I guess I also feel worse in that while I will miss her terribly, I also feel relieved; no more frantically holding her back whilst a stream of social workers and care assessors come in the door; no more desperately trying to stoop to clean up after her, or trying to muster the energy to groom; no more extreme guilt when she and I both eye her walking lead and yet I know if I take her even for a 20 minute walk I won't have the energy to get through the day.
There will be a huge hole in our lives which I have no intention of filling again (no more dogs, ever. That's it.) but I am grateful to Ludo for learning "chase-game", for fetching even if it's almost unheard of for this breed to do so, for putting her head on my knee when I needed the reassurance, for giving my son a topic of conversation with people he had never met who eventually, just as I do, saw that he wasn't just this disabled "thing", but a boy with a dog.
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0 comment Thursday, October 9, 2014 | admin
Family Fund was here, and while it's obvious what I'm asking for is quite expensive, I'm hopeful that at the very least we can get the fence done and maybe even do some paving. I won't be getting tonnes but it would be a start.
The returfing...hm. I've been doing some looking about and there's another way to manage the lumps, by putting compost in and raking down over the grass. It will take a few years to fill in but eventually the job would be a goodun. The garden might also benefit from aerating as well, and I think I could maybe do that sort of thing myself. It might not look pretty at first but it would help.
I'm still trying to appeal to various charities and things out there, even if some volunteers could come and clear out the rubbish and the brambles and so on (which would be a HUGE help). But things may be coming together here. I just have to keep the faith.
The returfing...hm. I've been doing some looking about and there's another way to manage the lumps, by putting compost in and raking down over the grass. It will take a few years to fill in but eventually the job would be a goodun. The garden might also benefit from aerating as well, and I think I could maybe do that sort of thing myself. It might not look pretty at first but it would help.
I'm still trying to appeal to various charities and things out there, even if some volunteers could come and clear out the rubbish and the brambles and so on (which would be a HUGE help). But things may be coming together here. I just have to keep the faith.
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0 comment Saturday, October 4, 2014 | admin
I have got to remember to include more photos but things have been busy....
We're having what is being termed a "dry spell" in true English understatement. What we've actually got are August-type temperatures peaking around 90 degrees and getting hotter, and not a drop of rain for weeks. Future reports but dry and hot seems to be the way of things. This means having to double-water everything in the garden at the moment, and the tomatoes - installed in growhouses due to past English summers - are always in danger of scorching, so I've been covering up the reflective plastic with old towels and leaving their doors wide open.
Strawberries are coming in full blush and I always manage to pick about a punnet a day, though I can sadly see the end in sight right now; the strawberries are getting smaller and smaller, and soon all I'll have is the plants. These still need nuturing however as I want to get some new runners installed into the empty pockets of the growing pot for next year. The oldest plants are in the top of the planter and probably will need replacing with new runners next year. My strawberries treat me well!
The raspberries, although in a very inadequate pot (I've been vetoed putting them in my garden as my neighbour doesn't want the chance of them growing into her space in the back; not sure how they're supposed to travel that far but whatever...) are going to give me a handful of berries this year. Nowhere near enough of course but I'm grateful! I'm going to try and figure out where to put the canes for a better crop next year without cramping anyone's style.
I'd write more but I have a appointment today which I cannot miss; so off to sort it.
We're having what is being termed a "dry spell" in true English understatement. What we've actually got are August-type temperatures peaking around 90 degrees and getting hotter, and not a drop of rain for weeks. Future reports but dry and hot seems to be the way of things. This means having to double-water everything in the garden at the moment, and the tomatoes - installed in growhouses due to past English summers - are always in danger of scorching, so I've been covering up the reflective plastic with old towels and leaving their doors wide open.
Strawberries are coming in full blush and I always manage to pick about a punnet a day, though I can sadly see the end in sight right now; the strawberries are getting smaller and smaller, and soon all I'll have is the plants. These still need nuturing however as I want to get some new runners installed into the empty pockets of the growing pot for next year. The oldest plants are in the top of the planter and probably will need replacing with new runners next year. My strawberries treat me well!
The raspberries, although in a very inadequate pot (I've been vetoed putting them in my garden as my neighbour doesn't want the chance of them growing into her space in the back; not sure how they're supposed to travel that far but whatever...) are going to give me a handful of berries this year. Nowhere near enough of course but I'm grateful! I'm going to try and figure out where to put the canes for a better crop next year without cramping anyone's style.
I'd write more but I have a appointment today which I cannot miss; so off to sort it.
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0 comment Monday, September 22, 2014 | admin
Two very playful kittens: CHECK! I'll write more later when we're done playing - and I'm done laughing at how hilarious they are. I have noted that due to being raised in an outdoor run they are not used to sounds - I put some music on and they were all "WTF" so I am now putting on David Attenborough vids on to get them used to voices, music, and noises. Playtime commences! With a bit of a groom and checking out the new lap available. They're so affectionate and trusting.
The old geeza Morgan isn't quite sure who these interlopers are, but he can't be bothered to tell them off, and just watches quietly, somewhat bewildered but never a hiss has he given. He's just lying down nearby and watching them run about. The kittens I think believe he's just a furry rock of some sort - they've sniffed him a few times but have left him be.
The day started out considerably sedate; we had loads of fog this morning and the cobwebs were aglow with dew. I hadn't had a stellar night's sleep thanks to the mutant growth on my shoulder (bleh) but I managed to get four-hour naps. I was up early to get money for the adoption process and I have always loved walking about in the mist - it's as if I'm one of the few people around in the world, and the stillness is wonderful. I decided since I haven't had a decent homecooked meal in a while I would do things up properly, making a casserole from the roast pumpkin and lamb shoulder I didn't really get to enjoy earlier this week, with a bit of gravy and porcino mushrooms. I've decided that pudding is a necessity during fall and as I've been given some apples; so I pulled blackberries out of the freezer and bashed together a crumble, complete with a splash of some organic white wine. It smells heavenly inside the house, and sprog will get some bangers and mash.
I got my stockpile shopping done today; so I have filled my mini-larder with pulses, a huge sack of spuds, some early pumpkins, garlic, loads of onions and fresh ginger for ginger beer. I'm feeling suitably more prepared for the fall and winter months and also rather glad I don't have to tromp about and burn two hours of energy at the supermarket, now I can order online and press a button. Not something I like to rely on however, hence stockpiling. Also, since I didn't bank on getting TWO cats, so I'm a bit worse off for cash for the next two weeks. No extras for a while but I don't mind.
I haven't really had a chance to do much today as pain is still intermittent. A whole lot of sitting about has ensued! But it's allowed me to hang out, and be an accommodating lap in a patch of sun for two lovely kittens - they had best rest up, my son will be home soon!
The old geeza Morgan isn't quite sure who these interlopers are, but he can't be bothered to tell them off, and just watches quietly, somewhat bewildered but never a hiss has he given. He's just lying down nearby and watching them run about. The kittens I think believe he's just a furry rock of some sort - they've sniffed him a few times but have left him be.
The day started out considerably sedate; we had loads of fog this morning and the cobwebs were aglow with dew. I hadn't had a stellar night's sleep thanks to the mutant growth on my shoulder (bleh) but I managed to get four-hour naps. I was up early to get money for the adoption process and I have always loved walking about in the mist - it's as if I'm one of the few people around in the world, and the stillness is wonderful. I decided since I haven't had a decent homecooked meal in a while I would do things up properly, making a casserole from the roast pumpkin and lamb shoulder I didn't really get to enjoy earlier this week, with a bit of gravy and porcino mushrooms. I've decided that pudding is a necessity during fall and as I've been given some apples; so I pulled blackberries out of the freezer and bashed together a crumble, complete with a splash of some organic white wine. It smells heavenly inside the house, and sprog will get some bangers and mash.
I got my stockpile shopping done today; so I have filled my mini-larder with pulses, a huge sack of spuds, some early pumpkins, garlic, loads of onions and fresh ginger for ginger beer. I'm feeling suitably more prepared for the fall and winter months and also rather glad I don't have to tromp about and burn two hours of energy at the supermarket, now I can order online and press a button. Not something I like to rely on however, hence stockpiling. Also, since I didn't bank on getting TWO cats, so I'm a bit worse off for cash for the next two weeks. No extras for a while but I don't mind.
I haven't really had a chance to do much today as pain is still intermittent. A whole lot of sitting about has ensued! But it's allowed me to hang out, and be an accommodating lap in a patch of sun for two lovely kittens - they had best rest up, my son will be home soon!
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0 comment Sunday, September 21, 2014 | admin
Not much to report. Really have been just way too tired, sprog has had several restless nights, and today of all days I had to take him to a dentist appointment. Went well, but I'm still shattered. I will hope and pray he'll actually go to sleep tonight at a decent hour and Won't. Wake. Up. Till. Morning.
I hope to at least get the front garden mowed and to do poo-patrol before the lads get here. Then energy reserves will be burned to keep sprog occupied for weekend. By energy reserves read "magical store of energy which doesn't exist but which every parent somehow summons from their core when needed."
I'll pay for it later, but for now, roll on.
I hope to at least get the front garden mowed and to do poo-patrol before the lads get here. Then energy reserves will be burned to keep sprog occupied for weekend. By energy reserves read "magical store of energy which doesn't exist but which every parent somehow summons from their core when needed."
I'll pay for it later, but for now, roll on.
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0 comment Thursday, September 11, 2014 | admin
not a bad job. I only helped at the beginning as he was having trouble with the different schematic scheme and the colours which indicate where pieces went; wasn't translating well in his head. Considering my son, at six, is the size of an average 10 year old child, this copter is HUGE. My personal theory is this is a father/son project designed to keep menfolk out of your hair for a day or two so you get things done...unless, of course, they start arguing about who the toy is actually for, but then, the size of the thing would solve that problem.
Now he wants the battleship.
Oy.
Now he wants the battleship.
Oy.
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0 comment Wednesday, September 3, 2014 | admin
No, I'm not joking....
The second grant I am applying for is Gardening for Disabled Trust. It is necessary for me to get a doctor's note of my condition for this, and for whatever reason (my surgery isn't the sharpest), they seemed to think this was a housing letter. In any event, the letter is done, but they charged me �20 for it.
Just...what?!
If you're on NHS and you need a letter from your doctor to apply for disabled housing, are you telling me that they charge you for this? I am absolutely appalled; how difficult is it to type up a letter? I was a PA and home typist for years, and I certainly never got �20 for a letter. The attorney might have, but a NHS doctor?
Just....wow. I'm furious, but like everyone else in this sort of situation, I'll pay it. Without it, I can't get the grant, and without it, disabled people couldn't apply for grants for their own homes or for council housing.
Still, I'm completely agahst.
LATER
The good news is that it's GORGEOUS outside, barely a cloud. I've taken the dog for walkies and I even opened some windows just for a fresh breeze. The birds were in fine chorus this morning, so let's hope for spring!
The second grant I am applying for is Gardening for Disabled Trust. It is necessary for me to get a doctor's note of my condition for this, and for whatever reason (my surgery isn't the sharpest), they seemed to think this was a housing letter. In any event, the letter is done, but they charged me �20 for it.
Just...what?!
If you're on NHS and you need a letter from your doctor to apply for disabled housing, are you telling me that they charge you for this? I am absolutely appalled; how difficult is it to type up a letter? I was a PA and home typist for years, and I certainly never got �20 for a letter. The attorney might have, but a NHS doctor?
Just....wow. I'm furious, but like everyone else in this sort of situation, I'll pay it. Without it, I can't get the grant, and without it, disabled people couldn't apply for grants for their own homes or for council housing.
Still, I'm completely agahst.
LATER
The good news is that it's GORGEOUS outside, barely a cloud. I've taken the dog for walkies and I even opened some windows just for a fresh breeze. The birds were in fine chorus this morning, so let's hope for spring!
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0 comment Monday, September 1, 2014 | admin
After consulting with the folks with regard to a woodburning stove...it's just too much money. WAY beyond my means and even though I have quite a bit saved, I'd need to double it just to get everything sorted out as it turns out the chimney does need lining. After much soul-searching, the truth remains: I am renting. I'd rather buy a few space heaters and have done, save a bit for the winter costs and leave it at that.
However, I still have this windfall sitting here and I am still trying to figure out what to do with it. Child's room has been updated, he has new clothes, new shoes, a bit left for his checkup with the dentist this summer (he has to go private for heavy sedation and they are so lovely it's worth the money), I've had some clothes for myself done, shoes as well, cleaner for house...what else?
Well, I'm considering getting myself a new computer and giving my son my laptop, for many different reasons. I like being able to update bits and bobs rather than having to do the whole thing, and more to the point, if the hard-drive fries I can just get another one. If the hard-drive on THIS fries, I have to buy a whole new computer regardless. Sproggo could have this one and then I could get a new system entirely since I need the power and the storage.
I'm still going back and forth about it, frightfully indulgent but my portfolio and writing work is stored on this thing and I simply cannot risk losing all of it yet again.
However, I still have this windfall sitting here and I am still trying to figure out what to do with it. Child's room has been updated, he has new clothes, new shoes, a bit left for his checkup with the dentist this summer (he has to go private for heavy sedation and they are so lovely it's worth the money), I've had some clothes for myself done, shoes as well, cleaner for house...what else?
Well, I'm considering getting myself a new computer and giving my son my laptop, for many different reasons. I like being able to update bits and bobs rather than having to do the whole thing, and more to the point, if the hard-drive fries I can just get another one. If the hard-drive on THIS fries, I have to buy a whole new computer regardless. Sproggo could have this one and then I could get a new system entirely since I need the power and the storage.
I'm still going back and forth about it, frightfully indulgent but my portfolio and writing work is stored on this thing and I simply cannot risk losing all of it yet again.
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0 comment Friday, August 22, 2014 | admin
When the bramble was cleared earlier this year, I had no idea what would be revealed; there was a LOAD of bramble out there, and while I'm certainly a fan of bramble-berries, I don't like the spiky plants in my garden. It was so prolific, I had no idea that anything could possibly be underneath all the stuff, but now, as I went round picking elderflowers yesterday, I made some rather amazing discoveries.
For one, I've always wanted a peony, and even though a friend graciously donated some tubers from her own huge plant, I'm more than aware it will be years before the thing decides to give me some blooms. Imagine my surprise when yesterday I found a overgrown peony growing in the lee side of the elderflower and snowberry! It's a small but obviously established plant and I would never have seen the thing due to winter die-back and all the brambles that used to be there. I'm overjoyed, and I think I'll be doing my best to rip out the shrubbery around it to give it some more room to grow.
The elderflower itself has been a nice find - and it turns out there's some elder growing out front, too! So perhaps purchasing an elder tree was a moot point. I'm in a bit of a quandary with the stuff outside. On the one hand it keeps the cats from using the under-tree area as a litter (and - disgusting but true, keeps my dog from eating the cat's droppings too). However, the cats are trying to rip up other areas in my beds for their leavings - there are soooo many cats in this region, and while I'm fond of them, I'm not fond of my garden turning into their midden. So, slices of lemon have been duly laid about and that should help to deter.
In addition to nice finds, I've got a bit of a woodland garden going alongside the house. I've already mentioned the lovely bluebells and primroses, but I've got freesias as well as a few other blooms which, thanks to being free of brambles, are starting to establish themselves. The bramble is trying to come back but it's sparse now thanks to the volunteer work, so I should be able to root out the last of the stuff myself. It looks a bit "wild" and probably always will do, but I rather like it wild out there. As long as I can keep the largish trees somewhat trimmed back (and this may require investing in some loppers soon) then it can stay as it is. I do however need to detach the chainlink fencing which, for whatever reason, was nailed to the lopped-off tree-trunk to one side of the house (which, also, was lopped off for who-knows-what reason rather than completely removed). It's covered with ivy now and I actually think it looks rather picturesque; so for now, it's staying.
In the front of the garden, I've found that I have gladioli coming up, and in the spring, there were some hydrangeas too. While I still think those beds aren't ever going to be very productive, having bulbs out there is quite nice. I've found some volunteer tulips which I've been transplanting to the front beds as and when, and hopefully I'll be able to find a few more.
The lilac bush is something I've decided I want to encourage back into bloom, provided I can keep it small and trimmed. I don't want it to choke out the white roses out front so I'll have to somehow strike a bit of a balance. Underneath this bedraggled rosebush is where I've found quite a few tulips, so again, a good find.
Now, contrary to the belief of the rental agency, there's been a lot of work done out there, and will be even more as things progress. The garden is coming along very nicely, but pacing myself proves rather difficult. There's so much to do and I want to do ALL of it right NOW! I'm especially keen as this week there's going to be a fair bit of rain, so working in the garden will be a rare activity. I'd take photos of all these nice garden finds, but unfortunately due to the barometric pressure change, my shoulder is playing up. I'm rather frustrated as I really want to be out there working on cutting down, trimming back, and re-cultivating my re-found plants today. But I'll have to wait till the paracetamol kicks in, then maybe I can get a little bit done today. Photos taken as I go!
For one, I've always wanted a peony, and even though a friend graciously donated some tubers from her own huge plant, I'm more than aware it will be years before the thing decides to give me some blooms. Imagine my surprise when yesterday I found a overgrown peony growing in the lee side of the elderflower and snowberry! It's a small but obviously established plant and I would never have seen the thing due to winter die-back and all the brambles that used to be there. I'm overjoyed, and I think I'll be doing my best to rip out the shrubbery around it to give it some more room to grow.
The elderflower itself has been a nice find - and it turns out there's some elder growing out front, too! So perhaps purchasing an elder tree was a moot point. I'm in a bit of a quandary with the stuff outside. On the one hand it keeps the cats from using the under-tree area as a litter (and - disgusting but true, keeps my dog from eating the cat's droppings too). However, the cats are trying to rip up other areas in my beds for their leavings - there are soooo many cats in this region, and while I'm fond of them, I'm not fond of my garden turning into their midden. So, slices of lemon have been duly laid about and that should help to deter.
In addition to nice finds, I've got a bit of a woodland garden going alongside the house. I've already mentioned the lovely bluebells and primroses, but I've got freesias as well as a few other blooms which, thanks to being free of brambles, are starting to establish themselves. The bramble is trying to come back but it's sparse now thanks to the volunteer work, so I should be able to root out the last of the stuff myself. It looks a bit "wild" and probably always will do, but I rather like it wild out there. As long as I can keep the largish trees somewhat trimmed back (and this may require investing in some loppers soon) then it can stay as it is. I do however need to detach the chainlink fencing which, for whatever reason, was nailed to the lopped-off tree-trunk to one side of the house (which, also, was lopped off for who-knows-what reason rather than completely removed). It's covered with ivy now and I actually think it looks rather picturesque; so for now, it's staying.
In the front of the garden, I've found that I have gladioli coming up, and in the spring, there were some hydrangeas too. While I still think those beds aren't ever going to be very productive, having bulbs out there is quite nice. I've found some volunteer tulips which I've been transplanting to the front beds as and when, and hopefully I'll be able to find a few more.
The lilac bush is something I've decided I want to encourage back into bloom, provided I can keep it small and trimmed. I don't want it to choke out the white roses out front so I'll have to somehow strike a bit of a balance. Underneath this bedraggled rosebush is where I've found quite a few tulips, so again, a good find.
Now, contrary to the belief of the rental agency, there's been a lot of work done out there, and will be even more as things progress. The garden is coming along very nicely, but pacing myself proves rather difficult. There's so much to do and I want to do ALL of it right NOW! I'm especially keen as this week there's going to be a fair bit of rain, so working in the garden will be a rare activity. I'd take photos of all these nice garden finds, but unfortunately due to the barometric pressure change, my shoulder is playing up. I'm rather frustrated as I really want to be out there working on cutting down, trimming back, and re-cultivating my re-found plants today. But I'll have to wait till the paracetamol kicks in, then maybe I can get a little bit done today. Photos taken as I go!
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0 comment Tuesday, August 19, 2014 | admin
My trip into the very local market today to search for very local produce paid off; even though I've known one of the co-owners of Angel Cottage Farm for years (he works at the local Neal's Yard) I had no idea he had a smallholding, and even less of a clue that he was raising chicken and lamb. Good grief, I've known him since before there was a sprog and never thought to ask about endeavours. But, he's now in production and I purchased a very hefty (and expensive, true) free range chicken which he processed only last week; it's had a chance to hang a bit and honestly it a massive bird. The meat was even better than the barn-raised stuff I've been having recently and I'm really chuffed with the quality. I'll be happy to be alternating the lamb with the rare breed lamb supplier from Langley Chase. That's our lamb and chicken now sorted, and we tend to eat that the most! I also stopped by for some local sausages from another local producer, but I'm still casting about for more pork (though we don't eat it often).
In addition, the autumn raspberries are in and the last of the strawberries too, so after visiting another local stall I scored not only these fruits but also - joy of joys - some onion squash. My hunt for squash was not in vain! So very chuffed, me; so I'm looking forward to my first squash of the fall, gently roasted with olive oil, cracked pepper, sea salt, sage from my garden and some local bacon (still had a bit left).
I had a lot of errand-running today and sorted out some overdue issues, though I'm still behind on getting my physio figured out. However, I won't really be able to start till September when sprog is back in school, so maybe that's well and good enough. I'm getting there.
Sprog is still on holiday with his dad in Yorkshire, and so I'm revelling in the quiet! I love Sproggo, truly I do, but he is a LOT of work, and on days like I've had on Monday, sometimes it's a good thing that I don't have an extra issue to deal with! However I have awesome friends; and while they clean my house, I cook for them. It works! We've been trading produce from our respective gardens since the crops have come in, and soon it will be apple trading from our respective trees and a fair bit of baking on my part to be sure we're all well catered for during the winter.
So I've now pretty much done all my major energy-requiring tasks for the day. It's now a cosy up on the daybed, have some tea, consider doing a bit more sewing on the Impractical Coat and then a movie and early bed. Sprog will be home before I know it so I'm racking up the extra hours of kip whilst I can!
In addition, the autumn raspberries are in and the last of the strawberries too, so after visiting another local stall I scored not only these fruits but also - joy of joys - some onion squash. My hunt for squash was not in vain! So very chuffed, me; so I'm looking forward to my first squash of the fall, gently roasted with olive oil, cracked pepper, sea salt, sage from my garden and some local bacon (still had a bit left).
I had a lot of errand-running today and sorted out some overdue issues, though I'm still behind on getting my physio figured out. However, I won't really be able to start till September when sprog is back in school, so maybe that's well and good enough. I'm getting there.
Sprog is still on holiday with his dad in Yorkshire, and so I'm revelling in the quiet! I love Sproggo, truly I do, but he is a LOT of work, and on days like I've had on Monday, sometimes it's a good thing that I don't have an extra issue to deal with! However I have awesome friends; and while they clean my house, I cook for them. It works! We've been trading produce from our respective gardens since the crops have come in, and soon it will be apple trading from our respective trees and a fair bit of baking on my part to be sure we're all well catered for during the winter.
So I've now pretty much done all my major energy-requiring tasks for the day. It's now a cosy up on the daybed, have some tea, consider doing a bit more sewing on the Impractical Coat and then a movie and early bed. Sprog will be home before I know it so I'm racking up the extra hours of kip whilst I can!
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0 comment Sunday, August 17, 2014 | admin
Today has been rather manic; lots of shopping and stockpiling so I can get my bake on this week and restock the freezer. I made potstickers and froze them in advance so I can make them whenever I like, and I've got muffins and bread to bake for snacks and treats. Winning Spagbol was made tonight and my son ate a huge plateful, and has asked for the same tomorrow - he has also impressed me by reading his Stage 2 book all by himself (he has shown zero interest in reading, and now suddenly jumped up a level and is reading rather confidently - that's just how he does everything it seems). I still haven't done cleaning, but I got the dishes done and some more laundry - with more tomorrow. I've also wrapped soap - but after 1pm I was doing all these little extra bits like potstickers and soap-wrapping whilst sitting down; there was just no other way.
Sprog has settled quite happily into his garden-watering routine after school, and he isn't overly disturbed by activity from either side of the garden whilst doing so. He is focussed on his own tasks and not consistently pestering for attention from others, so that's certainly helping (though one lad in particular is a bit consternated he can't get the rise out of Sprog like he used to...and serves him right, too). My son is doing very well with taking care of the plants in his rock-garden beds, watering gently and carefully. He understands if he doesn't take care of them, the plants will die, and so he shows considerable responsibility. I am very proud of him.
It's not yet 7:30 however and all the day's activity has caught up. I'm very aware that I've got four days to prepare for this event, and no recovery time afterwards to prepare for the week of half-term time off. The aches and pains are kicking off due to everything I've been up to today, and I've got more of the same tomorrow. I'll try and stick to my four-hour window, however, and I'm a pro at wrapping and labelling, so it won't take too much time.
The fruit is coming in now; English strawberries are on the market tables, and I picked up several punnets. The cherries are starting to show as well, though the glut from Kent will, I hope, be in the next few weeks. The pick-your-own days are coming soon, and since my dishwasher is currently being temperamental, I'm foregoing any more plans for beer or cider, and focussing on getting the wines started for the year - this means I only need a bucket and a glass demijohn, rather than face washing and disinfecting over 40+ bottles! This year's plots and plans are strawberry, maybe raspberry if I can get out to the PYO, and rosepetal. I'm foregoing cherry as it works out as the most expensive - not nearly as expensive as buying it in the store, mind, but these are funds I just don't have at the moment. As it stands, I'm now in between cash flow requirements for sprog's dentistry, painting the Wumpy House (fence will have to wait a bit), and the freezer which I am desperate to get before fall. So if I'm doing wine this year, I've got to do it cheap and well. The rosepetals will be from my own garden plants, for example. Done it before and it was very delicious, so going to try again.
The busy time for me is coming, where I really won't have anything called a "break" until some time in July. So, speaking of wine, as the day cools and the sky threatens rain, I'm going to have myself a cup of rose wine and just....chill.
Cheers.
Sprog has settled quite happily into his garden-watering routine after school, and he isn't overly disturbed by activity from either side of the garden whilst doing so. He is focussed on his own tasks and not consistently pestering for attention from others, so that's certainly helping (though one lad in particular is a bit consternated he can't get the rise out of Sprog like he used to...and serves him right, too). My son is doing very well with taking care of the plants in his rock-garden beds, watering gently and carefully. He understands if he doesn't take care of them, the plants will die, and so he shows considerable responsibility. I am very proud of him.
It's not yet 7:30 however and all the day's activity has caught up. I'm very aware that I've got four days to prepare for this event, and no recovery time afterwards to prepare for the week of half-term time off. The aches and pains are kicking off due to everything I've been up to today, and I've got more of the same tomorrow. I'll try and stick to my four-hour window, however, and I'm a pro at wrapping and labelling, so it won't take too much time.
The fruit is coming in now; English strawberries are on the market tables, and I picked up several punnets. The cherries are starting to show as well, though the glut from Kent will, I hope, be in the next few weeks. The pick-your-own days are coming soon, and since my dishwasher is currently being temperamental, I'm foregoing any more plans for beer or cider, and focussing on getting the wines started for the year - this means I only need a bucket and a glass demijohn, rather than face washing and disinfecting over 40+ bottles! This year's plots and plans are strawberry, maybe raspberry if I can get out to the PYO, and rosepetal. I'm foregoing cherry as it works out as the most expensive - not nearly as expensive as buying it in the store, mind, but these are funds I just don't have at the moment. As it stands, I'm now in between cash flow requirements for sprog's dentistry, painting the Wumpy House (fence will have to wait a bit), and the freezer which I am desperate to get before fall. So if I'm doing wine this year, I've got to do it cheap and well. The rosepetals will be from my own garden plants, for example. Done it before and it was very delicious, so going to try again.
The busy time for me is coming, where I really won't have anything called a "break" until some time in July. So, speaking of wine, as the day cools and the sky threatens rain, I'm going to have myself a cup of rose wine and just....chill.
Cheers.
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0 comment Monday, August 11, 2014 | admin
...another flare. I was up at 3am as the pain was too difficult to cope with; I'd been in a cold sweat the whole night and my sheets were soaked (a rather unfortunate and embarrassing aspect of fibro is night sweats). I came downstairs to watch a movie and check on the kitties, let Morgan in the house and fed him as well. He's taking the intrusion well but is a little weirded out; and of course he wants to eat their food! I keep chasing him off, but then he thinks I'm not allowing him to eat his own, and gets that rather feral-look on his face when he's stressed. He's upstairs at the moment, the boys are downstairs, sulking. It's time for his winter diet, in any event, and I'll be swapping him over to light food next month, mixing it with his current food to get him used to the change.
The wee boys were very hungry after not eating much yesterday, so ate well this morning. They need a bit of feeding up - I don't think the adult food they were on did them any favours, especially with the start they'd had. One of the boys has only half a tail (it was broken when he was a kit and snapped off; thankfully he survived). The other lad had a herniated umbilical, but it's healed now. They've just come off antibiotics for a cough and have recovered from the trials of early kittenhood.
They've been renamed: the half-tailed lad is Voodoo, and sprog has named the skinnier one Jester. After a hard morning of lots of food and running around like mad, they've been mobbing both me and sprog to try and figure out which of us make the better kittybed. Voodoo is the most people-oriented and always needs to sleep on my chest or shoulder. Jester is a bit more pre-possessed but when he's really tired gets somewhat cranky, so I have to be sure he beds down with his brother.
Today is going to be rather sedate. The lack of sleep for the past few nights is catching up with me, and my energy levels are rubbish. Just keeping up with laundry and dishes is proving an effort. I'm going to reserve what I have for sprog's return after school today, but this weekend he's off with his father, so I can go into full-on recovery mode. It's a bit boring, but after thinking I was recovering a bit yesterday afternoon and doing a bit more than I should have, the pain and inflammation got considerably worse in the evening, which wasn't a fun experience.
While I had hoped to pay my bills today, the chances I'm going to be able to get out of the house is rather slim. I'm going to attempt to give the antibiotics another day to work and hope there's marked improvement so I can at least somewhat function. Being damn near bedridden is for the birds.
The wee boys were very hungry after not eating much yesterday, so ate well this morning. They need a bit of feeding up - I don't think the adult food they were on did them any favours, especially with the start they'd had. One of the boys has only half a tail (it was broken when he was a kit and snapped off; thankfully he survived). The other lad had a herniated umbilical, but it's healed now. They've just come off antibiotics for a cough and have recovered from the trials of early kittenhood.
They've been renamed: the half-tailed lad is Voodoo, and sprog has named the skinnier one Jester. After a hard morning of lots of food and running around like mad, they've been mobbing both me and sprog to try and figure out which of us make the better kittybed. Voodoo is the most people-oriented and always needs to sleep on my chest or shoulder. Jester is a bit more pre-possessed but when he's really tired gets somewhat cranky, so I have to be sure he beds down with his brother.
Today is going to be rather sedate. The lack of sleep for the past few nights is catching up with me, and my energy levels are rubbish. Just keeping up with laundry and dishes is proving an effort. I'm going to reserve what I have for sprog's return after school today, but this weekend he's off with his father, so I can go into full-on recovery mode. It's a bit boring, but after thinking I was recovering a bit yesterday afternoon and doing a bit more than I should have, the pain and inflammation got considerably worse in the evening, which wasn't a fun experience.
While I had hoped to pay my bills today, the chances I'm going to be able to get out of the house is rather slim. I'm going to attempt to give the antibiotics another day to work and hope there's marked improvement so I can at least somewhat function. Being damn near bedridden is for the birds.
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0 comment Thursday, August 7, 2014 | admin
It's just that kind of day: incredibly overcast as all get out and too chill for me to want to venture outside for long. After a lovely Indian summer, proper fall returns and I was so very not ready for it! I made some comfort food - a very rich (possibly too rich for my digestion!) leek and potato soup with fresh local cream and cave-aged cheddar, chai tea, wholegrain bread. I have been buying my loaves rather than making them lately - I'm still very tired and trying to recuperate as much as I can, whilst still be productive and work - but I'm managing to cook slow-food to supplement some of the store-bought "sides". The garden is still sharing its bounty with me, and to my shock, the garlic I planted a week ago is trying to come up! I'm undecided; do I leave it? Do it cut it down? Since I intend on covering the bed with fleece I've opted to leave it.
Even though it's (for me) bitterly cold, I am now preparing the bed for planting again. This weekend I hope to put down the compost and cover the bed with cardboard, get another bag of soil in to topdress the houseplants (which have taken a bit of a beating due to me being in hospital and having young kittens untended!) as well as work into the bed outside. I'm thinning the chard and chicory as needed and I'll be ordering some more slug pellets from Tamar Organics and I found them very useful this year. They have some fleece offcuts which are going at a great price so I am purchasing some of that today as well. I have my mind well turned to the winter sowing and during half term I'll get sprog to help me do some "digging". I want to get some tulip bulbs planted outdoors for spring, as we're both very fond of tulips and I think a selection of purple, blue, black and white would look really unusual and stunning out there! I'll see what I can manage funds-wise in the next few weeks.
Actually, funds are proving to be easing up a load; part of the reason for this being sprog now eating school dinners (at his own insistence) and me qualifying for them being free. Add to this he is now attending the childminder three to four days out of the week and eating dinner there (and this is 80% paid for by my child credits). I'm increasing work hours for writing and art now, so tax creds are going up - more to the point I keep looking as if I'll hit my goal of getting my first material out by 10 November and into the e-book circuit, which, hopefully, will resort to a bit of cash return. My grocery bill has just been halved, essentially, and while I get bits and bobs for the pantry, the freezer is still heaving with meat, there's plenty of fruit and veg in the pantry and the cats are all well fed as well. I may end up with having more money available for other things, which is good as sprog is outgrowing his trousers for school rather quickly and I'll soon need to do a clothing shop for school uniforms and everything else.
I'm also going to be investing in a new crochet hook and working on doing some crochet work over the winter; I want to make some more arm and handwarmers, as well as a new scarf for sproggo. There's some lovely wool on sale at Folksy which I may invest in (delicious purple) and I may treat myself - it's been ages since I've done any crochet so I'll need to relearn the process (and try and keep the kittens out of it).
And of course, writing; it's all flowing very well and I get hit with inspiration constantly. I'm having to resort to "old school" - walking about with a small notebook and pen to write down when and how inspiration takes me; a discussion overheard on a train about the periodic table inspires a huge flight of fancy, and I scribble notes as a story unfolds in my head. I spent hours staring at the ceiling in the hospital and was struck at the amazing symmetry of the ceiling vents - I even took a photo of it and thought "good gods, that would make an amazing drawing". I feel I am making progress, and I'm sticking with the challenges of exercises and studies, even if they aren't always "art" or even particularly successful.
The kits need their second vaccination jabs, however I have opted to be irresponsible this week and I am treating myself and my dear friend who was absolutely a lifesaver during my stay in hospital to a spa treatment this weekend. Massage, facial, manicure, lunch out - an expensive bit of frippery but very needed and one of the best thank-yous I can manage to put together; she's been exemplary and I've been worried she's pushing her own condition to the brink in her selfless attempts to take care of mine. I think kits will be able to hold out for another couple of weeks before I subject them to jabs again.
Even though it's (for me) bitterly cold, I am now preparing the bed for planting again. This weekend I hope to put down the compost and cover the bed with cardboard, get another bag of soil in to topdress the houseplants (which have taken a bit of a beating due to me being in hospital and having young kittens untended!) as well as work into the bed outside. I'm thinning the chard and chicory as needed and I'll be ordering some more slug pellets from Tamar Organics and I found them very useful this year. They have some fleece offcuts which are going at a great price so I am purchasing some of that today as well. I have my mind well turned to the winter sowing and during half term I'll get sprog to help me do some "digging". I want to get some tulip bulbs planted outdoors for spring, as we're both very fond of tulips and I think a selection of purple, blue, black and white would look really unusual and stunning out there! I'll see what I can manage funds-wise in the next few weeks.
Actually, funds are proving to be easing up a load; part of the reason for this being sprog now eating school dinners (at his own insistence) and me qualifying for them being free. Add to this he is now attending the childminder three to four days out of the week and eating dinner there (and this is 80% paid for by my child credits). I'm increasing work hours for writing and art now, so tax creds are going up - more to the point I keep looking as if I'll hit my goal of getting my first material out by 10 November and into the e-book circuit, which, hopefully, will resort to a bit of cash return. My grocery bill has just been halved, essentially, and while I get bits and bobs for the pantry, the freezer is still heaving with meat, there's plenty of fruit and veg in the pantry and the cats are all well fed as well. I may end up with having more money available for other things, which is good as sprog is outgrowing his trousers for school rather quickly and I'll soon need to do a clothing shop for school uniforms and everything else.
I'm also going to be investing in a new crochet hook and working on doing some crochet work over the winter; I want to make some more arm and handwarmers, as well as a new scarf for sproggo. There's some lovely wool on sale at Folksy which I may invest in (delicious purple) and I may treat myself - it's been ages since I've done any crochet so I'll need to relearn the process (and try and keep the kittens out of it).
And of course, writing; it's all flowing very well and I get hit with inspiration constantly. I'm having to resort to "old school" - walking about with a small notebook and pen to write down when and how inspiration takes me; a discussion overheard on a train about the periodic table inspires a huge flight of fancy, and I scribble notes as a story unfolds in my head. I spent hours staring at the ceiling in the hospital and was struck at the amazing symmetry of the ceiling vents - I even took a photo of it and thought "good gods, that would make an amazing drawing". I feel I am making progress, and I'm sticking with the challenges of exercises and studies, even if they aren't always "art" or even particularly successful.
The kits need their second vaccination jabs, however I have opted to be irresponsible this week and I am treating myself and my dear friend who was absolutely a lifesaver during my stay in hospital to a spa treatment this weekend. Massage, facial, manicure, lunch out - an expensive bit of frippery but very needed and one of the best thank-yous I can manage to put together; she's been exemplary and I've been worried she's pushing her own condition to the brink in her selfless attempts to take care of mine. I think kits will be able to hold out for another couple of weeks before I subject them to jabs again.
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0 comment Tuesday, August 5, 2014 | admin
My computer died, and resulted in a major loss of data, but there are backups....still, someone wasn't following directions and it's cost me quite a bit. The good news is I've been writing longhand (painful, but doable), and illustrating again. The garden has been bedded down but I've got some winter crops to plant once I get some fleeces for the raised bed.
I'm currently retrieving passwords for everything and working on sprog's surprise birthday on Sunday. Then, I'll be getting some old files and getting back to work. Lots to do and I'm rather stunned how much I've relied on my computer.
I'm currently retrieving passwords for everything and working on sprog's surprise birthday on Sunday. Then, I'll be getting some old files and getting back to work. Lots to do and I'm rather stunned how much I've relied on my computer.
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0 comment Monday, August 4, 2014 | admin
I managed to stir myself in order to head out with neighbours to the Recycle Centre in order to get some of the local "Warrior Compost" - organic compost made in Wiltshire from the green bins people use in the area. Thank you, green-bin-people, thank you...because I brought home six bags of lovely, dense, black gold and spent the very scant sunlight-in-the-afternoon time repotting very overgrown indoor plants, potting up my garlic, getting my onions in the ground, shallots as well, starting off the first of a huge amount of potatoes, and and then planting some orange hubbard pumpkin seeds to see if I could get some of those going somewhere (though I'm still trying to decide where they'll go so Ludo won't eat them. I'd like my black futsu in the ground as well - I'm possibly being extremely optimistic as the summers haven't been anywhere near warm enough for squash to do well, but I'm SO tired of butternut squashes, it's not true. Maybe I can put them under a rudimentary cloche of some sort and hope! I also put my raspberry canes in a pot - not ideal, but when I said I was going to plant them out my neighbour protested; at her gran's house, the canes ran rampant and what was planted up against a fence then ran into the middle of the garden and she doesn't want them in her yard. Yes, I suppose if you never tended the canes, they'd do this, they are a bramble, but still, I shan't argue the point, and keep them potted up. I may even use my window-boxes when they start to sprout off so I can keep them in tidy rows.
With all the activity yesterday, however, I am once again utterly exhausted. Stupid of me, but I was so thrilled to get that compost in. I've certainly not planted everything but as they're predicting snow of all things at the beginning of April (joy :/ ) I didn't want to put anything out and then risk it not germinating; the carrots are going to have to wait until late April, for example.
I had six bags of compost but with all the planting and potting up, there's only one bag left now! I really wish there was a way to deliver the compost bags rather than having to go to the Centre - for people who want to garden and yet cannot drive, it's a bit of a dilemma. Still, the volunteer group is hopefully getting topsoil in for my raised bed, and if they do there will more than likely be a bit left over, so I can certainly manage to get the rest of the pots filled up.
The Wumpy House is currently being designed, and with luck will be ready to put into place by June; it's just a matter of getting ex out here with the tools, get the supplies, and then keep sprog out of his hair long enough that it can be built with a minimum of fuss and fight. However the Wump will get his chance, as he'll be allowed to help paint it. I've got two pots reserved to put out front of his own house, and will grow nasturtiums and chamomile in both - I should start some more chamomile, come to that; but will save that for Easter week, when sprog can help me pot up some more seeds.
Once the volunteers have been in, it will be time for me to bring the garden furniture into the outbuilding in the hopes it will dry out a bit so I can give it a proper clean and scrub, then give it a bit of treatment for the new year out. I've got a spare tarp outside rescued from the "compost" area which is going to be pressed into use to keep the furniture dry from now on, once it too gets a good scrub, so I've still got plenty to do in prep for spring - whenever it decided to arrive.
It's grim and dank outside and I'm on "energy maintenance mode" at the moment - which means business has suffered a bit this week as I haven't even listed new soaps or blogged for fans - but I'm still keeping a fair-weather eye on the horizon, and how much fun the summer will be.
With all the activity yesterday, however, I am once again utterly exhausted. Stupid of me, but I was so thrilled to get that compost in. I've certainly not planted everything but as they're predicting snow of all things at the beginning of April (joy :/ ) I didn't want to put anything out and then risk it not germinating; the carrots are going to have to wait until late April, for example.
I had six bags of compost but with all the planting and potting up, there's only one bag left now! I really wish there was a way to deliver the compost bags rather than having to go to the Centre - for people who want to garden and yet cannot drive, it's a bit of a dilemma. Still, the volunteer group is hopefully getting topsoil in for my raised bed, and if they do there will more than likely be a bit left over, so I can certainly manage to get the rest of the pots filled up.
The Wumpy House is currently being designed, and with luck will be ready to put into place by June; it's just a matter of getting ex out here with the tools, get the supplies, and then keep sprog out of his hair long enough that it can be built with a minimum of fuss and fight. However the Wump will get his chance, as he'll be allowed to help paint it. I've got two pots reserved to put out front of his own house, and will grow nasturtiums and chamomile in both - I should start some more chamomile, come to that; but will save that for Easter week, when sprog can help me pot up some more seeds.
Once the volunteers have been in, it will be time for me to bring the garden furniture into the outbuilding in the hopes it will dry out a bit so I can give it a proper clean and scrub, then give it a bit of treatment for the new year out. I've got a spare tarp outside rescued from the "compost" area which is going to be pressed into use to keep the furniture dry from now on, once it too gets a good scrub, so I've still got plenty to do in prep for spring - whenever it decided to arrive.
It's grim and dank outside and I'm on "energy maintenance mode" at the moment - which means business has suffered a bit this week as I haven't even listed new soaps or blogged for fans - but I'm still keeping a fair-weather eye on the horizon, and how much fun the summer will be.
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0 comment Friday, July 25, 2014 | admin
This will be my last entry in this blog. It's run its course...and in a way so have I.
I'll just out and say it: after much soul-searching and realisation that no, the council really isn't going to help me and no, the LEA really HAS denied our son going to a special school and yes, it IS actually getting nearly impossible to walk now and, probably, ATOS is going to put me through the appeals process before I get a scrap of funding to be mobile...my son is going to live with his father in September. Possibly sooner as I don't think I can make it through summer break. Gone, the garden. Gone, the house. Gone, the child.
End. Done. Game over.
I have "been strong" - for years I fought for my son's education as ex was too busy working/shaggingwhoever to be around for it. I have hung in there and tried not to give up, tried to keep working at home even when the evidence was quite clear working was probably the last thing I should be doing. I have done everything I could, transforming a crap house into something decent and running all about trying to make various arrangements to at least attempt to have a normal life. But with all the cuts which are currently happening it's becoming more and more clear to me just how much is disappearing; transport to and from school being cut, anything to "prevent family breakdown" is now gone, refusal to move me to a more suitable house, DLA for self, potentially DLA for child....all gone. What I contributed to when I was working, thinking it would be there when I needed it, has all quietly been axed, and nothing remains.
In utter bogglement, I have discovered that my social worker seems to think the reason my son goes off in school is because I'm abusing him at home. I'm ...well, speechless. I cannot believe that the triggers which I would have thought even a blind weasel could pick up (hell, even the ex picked it up in the minutes that the examples would set sprog off and he's not that observant) are ignored, and instead there are constant questions about where child goes on weekends, about him coming into school angry (the explanation that this may be because he HATES school is ignored entirely), and querying about whether ex would take child in if need be. I have been attempting to warn ex that the questioning is obviously going in the direction of shifting all blame to us rather than to the school but I'm ignored. Actually, I'm pretty much ignored no matter what I say to anyone I find.
Is ex the best choice? No, not really. But in this case, I'd rather the devil I knew than the devil I didn't; putting my child into care means hell would have to freeze first. Nevertheless, I predict after about three months of full time childminding ex will hire a nanny because he "can't cope". Sprog will be raised by a stranger and I will only get to see him once a month as he won't transport my son down to see me. Once a month, for one day, I'll see the only thing that kept me going for seven years when everything else fell apart.
But I cannot think of what else to do - the one school we looked into as a good possibility, the transport isn't there to get him to it. And even if it was there, how do I get through the half terms? The summer breaks? More and more evidence crops up that this damn disease has put so much stress on my liver and kidneys that there may be some damage. Discussions of pads and, if need be, dialysis, are kicking around. And that's only what the most common symptoms imply: there's all the fun stuff they haven't found yet. What chances of me surviving through six weeks of Wumping whilst having to go for test after test, observation after observation? If I had a shred of help, I might have been able to...but I don't.
I am applying for sheltered housing - chances I'll get it? Slim to none, but I won't be able to afford this house anymore, and it's too large for just me. I might even need to rehome my cats, which will just kick the pieces of my already broken heart, but I'll hope and pray I don't. I've been homeless before. It isn't pretty - I don't think I could do it again and survive, but if it comes to that, I want to get my son clear, even if it's dubious it's the better choice.
For seven years I sacrificed everything I had to raise my child, and I will be left with nothing. If there's anything to "be strong" about now, it's the bloodymindedness to just keep breathing in and out. Quite honestly, there's nothing to live for. Offer me no platitudes and chin-up speeches. You have no idea how hard I've been sobbing whilst I've been typing this. My heart is shattered and I cannot even possibly conceive of it ever coming together again. And unless you have EVER been right where I am standing, do not tell me it will. Don't you fucking dare.
Yesterday on a forum I belong to more and more disabled parents made the announcement that their own lifelines had been cut and they didn't know how they were going to manage; housebound, bedbound, paralysed, didn't matter - they are not the mythical "most vulnerable" we hear about so much but have never met. One woman wrote what I can only presume was her suicide note. I'm pretty certain the organisation volunteers tried to contact her, but we received no news on whether or not she was all right. I can only assume the worst - she wasn't asking for help because she knew, just as the rest of us do, that there isn't any. She was saying goodbye to us, and to her three children.
I'm not that far gone...not yet, but I cannot deny the possibility hasn't surfaced now and again. I force them back as I know the stress is making the lupus-brain-involvement worse, but since I have yet to convince a GP I have lupus I have no drugs to treat it with. Not even sure with my dodgy system more medication is the ticket anyway. Too many questions, not enough answers, no matter the urgency.
This is not a post I want to write. This isn't the way I wanted this blog to end. But I post this as my testament to what Big Society has become, and what it costs. This is what the cuts look like - a former legal professional and athlete reduced to biting her lip so hard it bleeds so her child upstairs won't hear her sobs as she goes over the paperwork to send him to be raised by strangers. Broken and aching in every joint in a way no medication touched any longer, she plots out how to spend the rest of her days rotting away out of sight of the public eye.
This is the truth of cuts. Cuts bleed. I'm lightheaded from blood loss and begging for a transfusion - the public walks over me, mutters something about scroungers, takes a photo on their mobile phones to show their mates on Facebook...and keep going.
I've nothing further to say.
I'll just out and say it: after much soul-searching and realisation that no, the council really isn't going to help me and no, the LEA really HAS denied our son going to a special school and yes, it IS actually getting nearly impossible to walk now and, probably, ATOS is going to put me through the appeals process before I get a scrap of funding to be mobile...my son is going to live with his father in September. Possibly sooner as I don't think I can make it through summer break. Gone, the garden. Gone, the house. Gone, the child.
End. Done. Game over.
I have "been strong" - for years I fought for my son's education as ex was too busy working/shaggingwhoever to be around for it. I have hung in there and tried not to give up, tried to keep working at home even when the evidence was quite clear working was probably the last thing I should be doing. I have done everything I could, transforming a crap house into something decent and running all about trying to make various arrangements to at least attempt to have a normal life. But with all the cuts which are currently happening it's becoming more and more clear to me just how much is disappearing; transport to and from school being cut, anything to "prevent family breakdown" is now gone, refusal to move me to a more suitable house, DLA for self, potentially DLA for child....all gone. What I contributed to when I was working, thinking it would be there when I needed it, has all quietly been axed, and nothing remains.
In utter bogglement, I have discovered that my social worker seems to think the reason my son goes off in school is because I'm abusing him at home. I'm ...well, speechless. I cannot believe that the triggers which I would have thought even a blind weasel could pick up (hell, even the ex picked it up in the minutes that the examples would set sprog off and he's not that observant) are ignored, and instead there are constant questions about where child goes on weekends, about him coming into school angry (the explanation that this may be because he HATES school is ignored entirely), and querying about whether ex would take child in if need be. I have been attempting to warn ex that the questioning is obviously going in the direction of shifting all blame to us rather than to the school but I'm ignored. Actually, I'm pretty much ignored no matter what I say to anyone I find.
Is ex the best choice? No, not really. But in this case, I'd rather the devil I knew than the devil I didn't; putting my child into care means hell would have to freeze first. Nevertheless, I predict after about three months of full time childminding ex will hire a nanny because he "can't cope". Sprog will be raised by a stranger and I will only get to see him once a month as he won't transport my son down to see me. Once a month, for one day, I'll see the only thing that kept me going for seven years when everything else fell apart.
But I cannot think of what else to do - the one school we looked into as a good possibility, the transport isn't there to get him to it. And even if it was there, how do I get through the half terms? The summer breaks? More and more evidence crops up that this damn disease has put so much stress on my liver and kidneys that there may be some damage. Discussions of pads and, if need be, dialysis, are kicking around. And that's only what the most common symptoms imply: there's all the fun stuff they haven't found yet. What chances of me surviving through six weeks of Wumping whilst having to go for test after test, observation after observation? If I had a shred of help, I might have been able to...but I don't.
I am applying for sheltered housing - chances I'll get it? Slim to none, but I won't be able to afford this house anymore, and it's too large for just me. I might even need to rehome my cats, which will just kick the pieces of my already broken heart, but I'll hope and pray I don't. I've been homeless before. It isn't pretty - I don't think I could do it again and survive, but if it comes to that, I want to get my son clear, even if it's dubious it's the better choice.
For seven years I sacrificed everything I had to raise my child, and I will be left with nothing. If there's anything to "be strong" about now, it's the bloodymindedness to just keep breathing in and out. Quite honestly, there's nothing to live for. Offer me no platitudes and chin-up speeches. You have no idea how hard I've been sobbing whilst I've been typing this. My heart is shattered and I cannot even possibly conceive of it ever coming together again. And unless you have EVER been right where I am standing, do not tell me it will. Don't you fucking dare.
Yesterday on a forum I belong to more and more disabled parents made the announcement that their own lifelines had been cut and they didn't know how they were going to manage; housebound, bedbound, paralysed, didn't matter - they are not the mythical "most vulnerable" we hear about so much but have never met. One woman wrote what I can only presume was her suicide note. I'm pretty certain the organisation volunteers tried to contact her, but we received no news on whether or not she was all right. I can only assume the worst - she wasn't asking for help because she knew, just as the rest of us do, that there isn't any. She was saying goodbye to us, and to her three children.
I'm not that far gone...not yet, but I cannot deny the possibility hasn't surfaced now and again. I force them back as I know the stress is making the lupus-brain-involvement worse, but since I have yet to convince a GP I have lupus I have no drugs to treat it with. Not even sure with my dodgy system more medication is the ticket anyway. Too many questions, not enough answers, no matter the urgency.
This is not a post I want to write. This isn't the way I wanted this blog to end. But I post this as my testament to what Big Society has become, and what it costs. This is what the cuts look like - a former legal professional and athlete reduced to biting her lip so hard it bleeds so her child upstairs won't hear her sobs as she goes over the paperwork to send him to be raised by strangers. Broken and aching in every joint in a way no medication touched any longer, she plots out how to spend the rest of her days rotting away out of sight of the public eye.
This is the truth of cuts. Cuts bleed. I'm lightheaded from blood loss and begging for a transfusion - the public walks over me, mutters something about scroungers, takes a photo on their mobile phones to show their mates on Facebook...and keep going.
I've nothing further to say.
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0 comment Wednesday, July 2, 2014 | admin
This has been a rather difficult week; there's some things going on with the tests with regard to my health which are concerning as it isn't normal..yet as seems to be the case with nearly everything I do, it's not "quite" dangerous enough to be taken seriously. The problem with everything being "borderline" is no one seems to have the sense to look at the collective whole and realise that maybe, added together, there's a serious problem here.
Something is definitely wrong with my immune system, but it's "borderline". The receptionist refused to even allow me to speak to my specialist, saying "nothing on the test jumps out as being a big deal, calm down and if you want to talk to the Doctor, write a letter." My specialist however isn't aware that I have been on antibiotics for over two months and that even then, the infection isn't shifting; I'm merely staving it off. Would be nice if the guard-dog would get out the way and allow me to TALK.
The same seems to be happening on the social services front at the moment - they want to talk to my GP as to "how your fibro affects you". At which point I queried why not talk to my son's social worker. "Oh, we need to talk to a doctor." I replied "He'll only be able to tell you exactly what I've told him because he doesn't know anything about how it affects me unless I tell him that."
I'm still dressing my surgery wound - which is still infected. I'm still using the anti-microbial wash as I can't take a bath or shower. I am still holed up in a daybed most of the day, saving energy so I can stand to be able to cook, cancelling appointments and days out as I don't have the energy to face it. I'm anaemic and having more blood drawn, so iron tablets may be making their way into my vitamins daily, but I'm more annoyed at that than anything else. We're treating SYMPTOMS here. The problem is still not being found. All the borderline, it's not that bad tests and symptoms look like no big deal on their own. Collectively, my life is being destroyed and no one sees it but me.
I had a rash last week across my face and forehead. I've managed to get it before, and always considered it just to be too much sun, but it's November. There's no chance of getting sunburn. A friend of mine suggested that was a lupus symptom. I was asked in a very roundabout way about these symptoms when I was at the specialist, but when people say "rash" I think of a really itchy, visible bumpy skin irritation, not just a bit of reddening. It never occurred to me that would count, but then again it never occurred to me till now that maybe that wasn't just too much sun.
I spend a bit of time in the garden, but it's getting too cold for me to do that now. I go out, put stuff in compost, collect a few apples, and eye the roses which are still trying to bloom. It's so nice to see that colour out there, otherwise I imagine I'd just start going rather mad at the moment. The house has never felt so much like a prison; I thought it was bad before.
I was wrong.
Something is definitely wrong with my immune system, but it's "borderline". The receptionist refused to even allow me to speak to my specialist, saying "nothing on the test jumps out as being a big deal, calm down and if you want to talk to the Doctor, write a letter." My specialist however isn't aware that I have been on antibiotics for over two months and that even then, the infection isn't shifting; I'm merely staving it off. Would be nice if the guard-dog would get out the way and allow me to TALK.
The same seems to be happening on the social services front at the moment - they want to talk to my GP as to "how your fibro affects you". At which point I queried why not talk to my son's social worker. "Oh, we need to talk to a doctor." I replied "He'll only be able to tell you exactly what I've told him because he doesn't know anything about how it affects me unless I tell him that."
I'm still dressing my surgery wound - which is still infected. I'm still using the anti-microbial wash as I can't take a bath or shower. I am still holed up in a daybed most of the day, saving energy so I can stand to be able to cook, cancelling appointments and days out as I don't have the energy to face it. I'm anaemic and having more blood drawn, so iron tablets may be making their way into my vitamins daily, but I'm more annoyed at that than anything else. We're treating SYMPTOMS here. The problem is still not being found. All the borderline, it's not that bad tests and symptoms look like no big deal on their own. Collectively, my life is being destroyed and no one sees it but me.
I had a rash last week across my face and forehead. I've managed to get it before, and always considered it just to be too much sun, but it's November. There's no chance of getting sunburn. A friend of mine suggested that was a lupus symptom. I was asked in a very roundabout way about these symptoms when I was at the specialist, but when people say "rash" I think of a really itchy, visible bumpy skin irritation, not just a bit of reddening. It never occurred to me that would count, but then again it never occurred to me till now that maybe that wasn't just too much sun.
I spend a bit of time in the garden, but it's getting too cold for me to do that now. I go out, put stuff in compost, collect a few apples, and eye the roses which are still trying to bloom. It's so nice to see that colour out there, otherwise I imagine I'd just start going rather mad at the moment. The house has never felt so much like a prison; I thought it was bad before.
I was wrong.
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0 comment Monday, June 30, 2014 | admin
I am not a patient at Bath Royal National Hospital for Rheumatic Diseases yet but thanks to their close connections to Lupus UK and the specialists they have on hand who know what a nightmare the illness can be, the hospital is doing their best to get me in to see them, even going so far as wanting to speak to my GP directly (or at least my surgery) to convince them that in this particular instance it would be best to be treated at a specialist centre.
Western Lupus UK has been amazing as well; I'm a total stranger and yet when I first talked to the contact on the phone, I just burst into tears (something I rarely do). So sympathetic and so willing to dig up the information for me as they've done this walk through fire before me.
This is really heartening news as the amazingly clueless social worker came round and let me know that the LEA is not going to move my son to a special needs school. In addition, he actually said to me "Well, what would be wrong with your son walking to school?" which to my mind pretty much said EVERYTHING I needed to know about whether or not he was even remotely in touch with our needs. Short answer: no. Long answer: HELL no. I have called the Child and Family Services to ask for another social worker. Failing that I am strongly considering asking them to close the file - I've got absolutely nothing out of the whole thing and it just wastes my time.
In any event, allowing ex to fight the Tribunal battle as he loves a good argument (ahem); will try something on the Child and Families front and if that doesn't work I will consider just closing the file, and working toward trying to get another piece of the puzzle together so I can at least attempt to control the feeling-like-hell portion of my days.
Western Lupus UK has been amazing as well; I'm a total stranger and yet when I first talked to the contact on the phone, I just burst into tears (something I rarely do). So sympathetic and so willing to dig up the information for me as they've done this walk through fire before me.
This is really heartening news as the amazingly clueless social worker came round and let me know that the LEA is not going to move my son to a special needs school. In addition, he actually said to me "Well, what would be wrong with your son walking to school?" which to my mind pretty much said EVERYTHING I needed to know about whether or not he was even remotely in touch with our needs. Short answer: no. Long answer: HELL no. I have called the Child and Family Services to ask for another social worker. Failing that I am strongly considering asking them to close the file - I've got absolutely nothing out of the whole thing and it just wastes my time.
In any event, allowing ex to fight the Tribunal battle as he loves a good argument (ahem); will try something on the Child and Families front and if that doesn't work I will consider just closing the file, and working toward trying to get another piece of the puzzle together so I can at least attempt to control the feeling-like-hell portion of my days.
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0 comment Saturday, June 28, 2014 | admin
Ever have one of those days that was so flippin' awful you just ended up laughing for a few minutes?
I had to rehome my massive dog this weekend, even though she was a great deterrent to the anti-social yobs. Pretty important for a disabled chick with a disabled kid. Without her rarely-used but incredibly double'ard bark at night, I'm sure my house would have been a target for a break-in.
Well around 2am I was awakened out of a dead sleep because I heard someone trying to open my door. I spent too many years sleeping rough and as a parent to a kid who likes to wander to not be clued into this sort of thing when it happens, so I was up out of bed like a shot, grabbed my emergency panic button I wear in case I have a fall, closed the door to my room and sat down to block it (I'm a fat chick, good luck opening that door, buddy). Thankfully son wasn't home, but my neighbours were gone too so there was no way for me to raise an alarm. I waited a few minutes, and then started turning on lights in my room and in the hallway. This usually gets people to scarper - it's surprising burglars that gets them violent. I still didn't hear owt, so I decided to raise the alarm, and I pressed my panic button - this sets off my phone system and a voice announces throughout my house that the emergency for my address has been activated. Now THAT time I heard them bugger off quickly, get into a car outside and off they went.
So, stupid me - shaking by now, but mostly just pissed off, was a time I would have eaten buggers like that for breakfast - I hear my cat outside. I turn on every single light on upstairs, and then start to head downstairs as I need to shut my alarm off and answer the phone to let my emergency person know what happened (a call goes directly to her when my system is activated).
And fall. HARD. Like thank the deities for all those workouts and drinking milk when i was a kid and I never broke a bone - because I should have broken something. Lying at the bottom of the stairs I thought "Well at least I pressed my button in advance."
After taking about ten minutes to get up (damn my joints, damn them I say) I realise I'm going to be sporting the very latest in fashionable bruises down my left side, but at least I didn't break anything. Of course now I'm freaked out and my cat isn't anywhere near impressed either. I let him in, turn on every light again, satisfy myself that no one got in, call my emergency person, and hobble upstairs to get Absolutely. No. Sleep. At. All. Too much adrenaline, too much pain.
So today, after a fitful night I get up - with a migraine. Figures, after the early morning festivities. I get a friend to do my shopping (no chance I can do it myself today) and I start to try to tidy the house. I take my rubbish outside, open the windows, pootle about in bare feet (better grip so I can keep my balance) and I just start watering my plants outdoors when -
Slam. The front door closes.
And locks.
****.
I have no way into my house except going round the back, and in order to do THAT, I have to go round to my next door neighbours' - who isn't home - move the huge barrier they put across their walkway to try and deter burglars from breaking in (thank you, old weightlifting days, I can still shift it when I have to) and climb precariously over the stone fence to get into my back door. With a sore hip. And no panic button.
No pressure.
I manage to climb onto their rockery, use a rudimentary stepping ladder to get over the fence, put my foot down on my raised bed in my back garden as I note with relief the back door is open -
And step on a bee.
Srsly.
I've never been stung in my life, so this was new. "Ow, damn! Must have hit one of the thorns on my rosebush - no, OW, is that glass? OWWWWW SH---------!!!!!"
I manage to keep it together enough to not fall off the wall, get myself into my back garden, hopping - the damn bee, or wasp or whatever it was still actually dangling from underneath my toe where it nailed me - into my house, get the thing off (no sting left in, so a wasp). Get my shoes on, get my keys, and outside AGAIN to get some plantain to put on the sting.
I'm now sitting on my bed with my foot on fire, my hip turning a lovely shade of purple and blue, and I've just realised I started laughing as this has got to be proof that good ol' Tinker is not allowed to be on her own today, so a friend of mine is coming over. You know, to make sure I don't accidentally amputate my own arm with a butter knife or something.
I'm sure your Monday has been better than mine. If not, gods help you.
I fail.
I had to rehome my massive dog this weekend, even though she was a great deterrent to the anti-social yobs. Pretty important for a disabled chick with a disabled kid. Without her rarely-used but incredibly double'ard bark at night, I'm sure my house would have been a target for a break-in.
Well around 2am I was awakened out of a dead sleep because I heard someone trying to open my door. I spent too many years sleeping rough and as a parent to a kid who likes to wander to not be clued into this sort of thing when it happens, so I was up out of bed like a shot, grabbed my emergency panic button I wear in case I have a fall, closed the door to my room and sat down to block it (I'm a fat chick, good luck opening that door, buddy). Thankfully son wasn't home, but my neighbours were gone too so there was no way for me to raise an alarm. I waited a few minutes, and then started turning on lights in my room and in the hallway. This usually gets people to scarper - it's surprising burglars that gets them violent. I still didn't hear owt, so I decided to raise the alarm, and I pressed my panic button - this sets off my phone system and a voice announces throughout my house that the emergency for my address has been activated. Now THAT time I heard them bugger off quickly, get into a car outside and off they went.
So, stupid me - shaking by now, but mostly just pissed off, was a time I would have eaten buggers like that for breakfast - I hear my cat outside. I turn on every single light on upstairs, and then start to head downstairs as I need to shut my alarm off and answer the phone to let my emergency person know what happened (a call goes directly to her when my system is activated).
And fall. HARD. Like thank the deities for all those workouts and drinking milk when i was a kid and I never broke a bone - because I should have broken something. Lying at the bottom of the stairs I thought "Well at least I pressed my button in advance."
After taking about ten minutes to get up (damn my joints, damn them I say) I realise I'm going to be sporting the very latest in fashionable bruises down my left side, but at least I didn't break anything. Of course now I'm freaked out and my cat isn't anywhere near impressed either. I let him in, turn on every light again, satisfy myself that no one got in, call my emergency person, and hobble upstairs to get Absolutely. No. Sleep. At. All. Too much adrenaline, too much pain.
So today, after a fitful night I get up - with a migraine. Figures, after the early morning festivities. I get a friend to do my shopping (no chance I can do it myself today) and I start to try to tidy the house. I take my rubbish outside, open the windows, pootle about in bare feet (better grip so I can keep my balance) and I just start watering my plants outdoors when -
Slam. The front door closes.
And locks.
****.
I have no way into my house except going round the back, and in order to do THAT, I have to go round to my next door neighbours' - who isn't home - move the huge barrier they put across their walkway to try and deter burglars from breaking in (thank you, old weightlifting days, I can still shift it when I have to) and climb precariously over the stone fence to get into my back door. With a sore hip. And no panic button.
No pressure.
I manage to climb onto their rockery, use a rudimentary stepping ladder to get over the fence, put my foot down on my raised bed in my back garden as I note with relief the back door is open -
And step on a bee.
Srsly.
I've never been stung in my life, so this was new. "Ow, damn! Must have hit one of the thorns on my rosebush - no, OW, is that glass? OWWWWW SH---------!!!!!"
I manage to keep it together enough to not fall off the wall, get myself into my back garden, hopping - the damn bee, or wasp or whatever it was still actually dangling from underneath my toe where it nailed me - into my house, get the thing off (no sting left in, so a wasp). Get my shoes on, get my keys, and outside AGAIN to get some plantain to put on the sting.
I'm now sitting on my bed with my foot on fire, my hip turning a lovely shade of purple and blue, and I've just realised I started laughing as this has got to be proof that good ol' Tinker is not allowed to be on her own today, so a friend of mine is coming over. You know, to make sure I don't accidentally amputate my own arm with a butter knife or something.
I'm sure your Monday has been better than mine. If not, gods help you.
I fail.
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0 comment Monday, June 23, 2014 | admin
I had every intention of posting a photo of some of my strawberries this morning, but then I ate one...and then I had another, and a third for luck and...well, end result, I've no fresh strawberries to show you!
They are coming in and doing well however; lots of strawberries ripening and more and more coming along. I'm keeping things fertilised but I've also pinched off some of the leaves to allow more of the plants to focus on fruit, and for the berries to have more sunlight. The giant strawberry planters I have really do the trick, but my one complaint is that the strawberries don't get much light at the top, and none at the back, so I don't use the back-slots for runner plants. Still, I've got more than enough strawberry plants at the moment for me and sprog to have a handful of berries every day, which saves a fair bit of cash of the grocery front when fresh fruit is available like this.
We are in for a dry spell (no one dares to say "drought" yet). I have to admit I wish I could be more concerned, but it seems like it's been ages since we had a proper summer! Right now I'm loving the sun and the weather and the impromptu ice-cream sessions. We haven't had a barbecue yet, but when sprog is home for summer hols I imagine we'll spent most of our time eating outside, and there will be plenty of barbies then. We've finished most of our elderflower cordial (though there's more in the fridge for later in the year) and we've moved to a mint-and-lime concoction I've made recently which both sprog and I like and drink in copious amounts. This does however mean that I have been keeping a eye on the water situation and, even though we live on wetlands, I'm aware there may be a hose ban on during the summer at some point. I'm trying to grow the grass back in and also keep the garden watered right now, but I'm also aware that the garden may suffer a bit during August if things continue as they're doing now.
So for now I'm watering like mad while I can, although I cringe a bit; I really wish I could use the bathwater for some of my watering needs but I'm not sure how that works - for all I know there's probably regulations against it here in the UK. I don't like using all this water just to grow some grass, but the dust-bowl out there currently isn't fun for sprog and it's given my dog yet another eye infection, so needs must. Today will be a bit of a light lunch and a glass of Something Rosey as today's requirements are sorted and I need a bit of rest for tomorrow (sprog dentist appointment, whee - and a long bloody walk up a big bloody hill at the end).
Other stuff has included getting some financial help as I have officially closed my business (yay, I'm now going to be One Of Those 'orrible Benefits Scroungers...picture my enthusiasm) and turning an eye to mobility issues, the potential of getting some help with getting out and about, and also what I'm going to do about the currently quite-rubbish-path up to my place.
They are coming in and doing well however; lots of strawberries ripening and more and more coming along. I'm keeping things fertilised but I've also pinched off some of the leaves to allow more of the plants to focus on fruit, and for the berries to have more sunlight. The giant strawberry planters I have really do the trick, but my one complaint is that the strawberries don't get much light at the top, and none at the back, so I don't use the back-slots for runner plants. Still, I've got more than enough strawberry plants at the moment for me and sprog to have a handful of berries every day, which saves a fair bit of cash of the grocery front when fresh fruit is available like this.
We are in for a dry spell (no one dares to say "drought" yet). I have to admit I wish I could be more concerned, but it seems like it's been ages since we had a proper summer! Right now I'm loving the sun and the weather and the impromptu ice-cream sessions. We haven't had a barbecue yet, but when sprog is home for summer hols I imagine we'll spent most of our time eating outside, and there will be plenty of barbies then. We've finished most of our elderflower cordial (though there's more in the fridge for later in the year) and we've moved to a mint-and-lime concoction I've made recently which both sprog and I like and drink in copious amounts. This does however mean that I have been keeping a eye on the water situation and, even though we live on wetlands, I'm aware there may be a hose ban on during the summer at some point. I'm trying to grow the grass back in and also keep the garden watered right now, but I'm also aware that the garden may suffer a bit during August if things continue as they're doing now.
So for now I'm watering like mad while I can, although I cringe a bit; I really wish I could use the bathwater for some of my watering needs but I'm not sure how that works - for all I know there's probably regulations against it here in the UK. I don't like using all this water just to grow some grass, but the dust-bowl out there currently isn't fun for sprog and it's given my dog yet another eye infection, so needs must. Today will be a bit of a light lunch and a glass of Something Rosey as today's requirements are sorted and I need a bit of rest for tomorrow (sprog dentist appointment, whee - and a long bloody walk up a big bloody hill at the end).
Other stuff has included getting some financial help as I have officially closed my business (yay, I'm now going to be One Of Those 'orrible Benefits Scroungers...picture my enthusiasm) and turning an eye to mobility issues, the potential of getting some help with getting out and about, and also what I'm going to do about the currently quite-rubbish-path up to my place.
Labels: Random